7 Surprising Reasons You’re Lucky To Be Single
It’s hardly surprising that, as a dating coach, I speak to a lot of women who hate being single.
My dilemma? The more a woman hates being single, the more likely good men will want to leave her there.
A man becoming your partner means he’s signing up to be a part of your world. A big part. Hardly something he will do if you think your world sucks.
When you love your single life and the rare benefits it provides, not only will you be a darn sight happier, but I guarantee, you’ll soon attract a quality man who wants to become a part of that world.
We all know the obvious benefits of being single. Taking care of yourself. Answering to no one. The ability to have fun without being judged.
But here’s 7 benefits you might not have considered that are more valuable than you might think
1. It’s a chance to change what you’ve been attracting
Apart from your parents, no one will have a greater impact on your life than your choice of eventual partner.
If you’re single, it’s because – so far at least – you haven’t been attracting what you want.
But how many of us use this obvious piece of information to do something about it?
If you’ve attracted consecutive men with undesirable traits, the fact you’re now single means you have a small window of opportunity to change it.
Consciously date men outside your ‘type’. Read a book about attraction. Change the way you do things and where you meet people.
“If you’ve attracted consecutive men with undesirable traits, the fact you’re now single means you have a small window of opportunity to change it.”
If you don’t use this incredible opportunity to learn and change, you’ll end up dating the same guy in a different body, one step closer to running out of time.
2. You’ll never have this much freedom in your evenings again
Most people work during the day and have their night’s commitment free, but what do you do with the time?
When you’re in a relationship, especially when you’re living with the person, evenings usually serve as quality time spent with a loved one.
But if you’re single, there is no loved one… yet. From 6pm until 10pm, you can do whatever you wish. That’s 20 valuable hours a week that you’ll never have as free as you do right now.
How are you using that time?
Being single is your last chance to use that immeasurably valuable time to full advantage. Rather than watching TV, use the time to put yourself first. Build a dream or follow a passion. Have a bubble bath. Read a book that grows you. Usable time like this won’t be around forever, and you’ll miss it when it’s gone. Being single is your last chance to put your evenings towards you. There may not be many left – use them while you’ve got them.
3. It’s Your Last Chance To Grow Yourself Solo
Do good couples grow together? Of course. But there’s always limitations on the directions you can grow and things you can do, once you lose your single status. Like it or not, a portion of your time, freedom, and opportunities dissipate as part of a committed couple. Of course – this happens for a good reason – for something wonderful in return. The companionship, love, and security of a good relationship is priceless.
“Once it’s gone, you’re unlikely to ever enjoy it in the same way again.”
If you’re single, those things are still to come, but don’t underestimate the freedom and potential for growth you have right now. Your time is yours. The opportunity to meet people, build confidence, and spend your time out in the world is a privilege, whose value should not be underestimated. Once it’s gone, you’re unlikely to enjoy it in the same way again.
4. Being single is your last chance to meet Mr. Right
I’m not a huge believer in the ‘soulmate’ idea. What if your ‘soulmate’ never leaves Samoa? And how is it so many find their ‘soulmate’ within the small pool of people they attended high school with?
The reality is, we’re probably compatible – to varying degrees – with more than one person, which means the more people you meet, the better your chances of finding a highly compatible one.
If you want a great job, you work hard for it. If you want to be great at a sport, you practice hard. And if you want a great relationship with a great guy…
“…finding someone you’re highly compatible with is more likely to ‘just happen’ when you’re out there meeting people.”
Most people hope they’ll just stumble into it.
The fact is, finding someone you’re highly compatible with is more likely to ‘just happen’ when you’re out there meeting people. Thus, the more you meet, the less likely you are to fall for someone with partial compatibility. Being single is your last chance to find someone fully compatible.
5. Being single is your last chance to travel alone
Long distance relationships are tough, and the percentages that survive reflect that. Solo travelling, especially for long periods of time, makes it difficult to sustain any relationship. We’d all like to think our decisions to embark on adventure are unaffected by our hearts… but let’s be honest; it’s not true.
Women who travel solo – especially for extended periods – cite doing so as one of their biggest periods of growth and self-discovery. It’s a gift that – for the most part – only single women get to enjoy.
If you’re single right now, it could be the last year, month, or even day, you enjoy that status. Plan to travel now. Use your time single for everything it’s worth. The days you have left single and free are ticking away, and you just won’t know when the clock will hit “0”.
6. Being single is your last chance to put your girlfriend’s first
Friendships between females too often get left behind as part of committed relationships.
This is partly expected. As a man works his way up to becoming the primary person in your life; the reality is, the girls will take a back seat. That’s natural, and it’s reflective of the time and importance of what your major relationship brings to your life. It doesn’t mean the girls get left behind entirely, but it mean they never again get to ride shotgun.
If you’re single, it could be the last period of your life you have to make your girlfriends your top priority. You’ll always need them for advice and support, and if your major relationship breaks down, you’ll need them ever more. But there will soon come a day where you won’t be single, and it’ll be the first day of a slow, but steady, shift in the roles they play in your life. Treasure them and foster connections with them while you still can; you never know when your last day single might be.
7. Being single is your last chance to chase your dreams with no holds barred
Is there something burning inside of you? Something you know you want to do, give, or contribute to the world, but which you’ve never had the time or courage to go after?
Some dreams take time. Serious time. Whatever yours, if you’re single and go after an opportunity, you have a unique advantage over anyone in a committed relationship. You simply have more time you can devote to it.
“…if you’re single and go after an opportunity, you have a unique advantage over anyone in a committed relationship. You simply have more time.”
Will you look back and know you used the time you had well?
Being single might seem like a bother, but the grass always looks greener on the other side. Use the short time you have single for all it’s worth. One day you’ll be sitting on the other side of the fence with the man of your dreams, the gate permanently locked behind you, and even though you’ll be happy, there’ll still be a little part of you missing the most liberating period of your life.