How to Be Down to Earth (And Why It’s So Attractive)
What’s the number one thing guys and girls look for on dating profiles? You guessed it, someone who’s ‘down to earth’. It’s also one of the most common attributes people associate with themselves. But, what does it really mean? Is everyone really so down to earth, or is it just an empty statement to help score a right swipe on Tinder?
There’s no doubt that men love down to earth women, just like you probably look for the quality in men you date. However, it’s pretty rare to find an actual down to earth person, who’ll tell you that. Why? Because they don’t need to.
They literally show it in everything they do. Here’s how.
They’re Not Concerned With The Superficial
People who are truly down to earth are comfortable within themselves, so they behave authentically. This means superficial trends, like fashion or the latest buzz word, don’t really impact them, let alone make them feel like they have to follow suit. As to how they look, appearances are all about portraying individual traits, rather than any concern with being society’s version of perfect.
A down to earth woman stills takes pride in her appearance but understands that, ultimately, it’s not her best asset. She knows she doesn’t have to wear a full face of makeup on every date to get the guy she wants. In fact, because she embraces her looks and respects her own sense of style, she’s often the one looking naturally gorgeous, in the midst of carbon-copy, ‘high maintenance’ women.
It’s her authentic, easy vibe and energy that stands out more than anything. That’s what’s compelling to everyone and super sexy to men. Try forgetting about superficial standards that drive women to have a fit if a nail breaks right before a date. Men just don’t care – unless you choose to whinge about it over dinner. In that case, he will care, possibly enough to delete your number afterwards.
They Don’t Flaunt Achievements
There are hundreds of sayings about people who brag, like ‘only small people need to make themselves look big’ and ‘confidence is silent, insecurities are loud’. It’s generally true, that people who’ve mastered a skill, are stunningly beautiful, exceptionally smart or incredibly kind, are never the ones telling everyone about it. There’s no need, as the proof is in the proverbial pudding.
That’s not to say you can’t ,or shouldn’t, let your date know how great your life is. It’s all in how you say it. If a guy asks you how everything’s going, and you’re not a down to earth gal, you might respond with something like, “OMG amazing! I just beat 50 other professional dancers in an audition for a new show in Japan! My Instagram has gone through the roof since I announced it, everyone’s asking for updates and my followers are loving my new portfolio pics. One of them even has over 10 000 likes! Have you seen it yet? It’s the one on the beach in that amazing red dress.”
“A down to earth woman doesn’t sound any less amazing because she leaves the bragging part out. It’s about how she says it.”
Are you cringing? You can bet he is. Or, you could respond with, “Things have been great thanks. I got a dancing role in a show I’m really excited about, plus it’s in Japan so the travel will be heaps of fun. I feel so blessed for the opportunity and can’t wait to get started in rehearsals next week. How’s everything going with you?”
A down to earth woman doesn’t sound any less amazing because she leaves the bragging part out. In fact, not only does the second statement indicate that she’s obviously successful at what she does, it shows she’s grateful, ready for adventure and up for a challenge. Is there anything more attractive? Just one thing – as much interest in the person she’s talking to, as she has in herself.
They Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously
Can you make fun of yourself when things go wrong? Are you quick to laugh, rather than get upset at little incidents? If so, this is one of the best indications of a down to earth woman. When you’re generally happy and relaxed, you don’t let small things bother you, whether they’re to do with you, your date or the scenario.
For example, let’s say you accidentally drop a piece of spaghetti on your top on a dinner date, in the middle of a great conversation. You could feel mortified, become nervous and awkwardly try to clean yourself up, all the while apologizing to your date for being so clumsy and effectively ending the chat. Or, you could laugh at yourself and acknowledge his inevitable amusement, quickly clean it up and carry on with the conversation like nothing happened.
Behavior is a choice and an easy going woman won’t sweat the small stuff. If you find it hard to control feeling embarrassed or nervous, just remember everyone’s in the same situation, when it comes to meeting new people and dating. Laughing always lightens the mood, while taking things too seriously squashes it – for you and for him. Stay in the moment and don’t worry too much about what he thinks. After all, if he has a problem with a woman because she spills a bit of spag bol on her top, you really don’t want him.
They Accept Others
A down to earth woman doesn’t feel the need to compare herself to others, so it’s easy for her to accept people as they are. When you judge others, especially in a way that makes it seem like you’re better than them, it stems from something within yourself you don’t like. It doesn’t really make you feel good, either. It’s just that, for a moment, you can excuse your own perceived flaws because someone else apparently has them too.
When you’re comfortable with who you are, the motto ‘live and let live’ rings true in most cases. Even if you don’t agree with someone, or you’d never do what they do, you don’t feel the need to vilify them for their decisions. You feel happy for people to do what’s right for them and curious about what makes them tick, rather than angry they don’t see it your way.
They Don’t Worry About Other People’s Opinions Of Them
On the flip side, down to earth women also don’t have the time or the inclination to give weight to the judgement of others. They’ll happily speak their truth, regardless of whether or not someone agrees, thinks they’re a nerd or doesn’t like what they have to say.
Let’s say you’re out to dinner and you spontaneously say to your date, “I’ve been spending heaps of time gardening lately.” He laughs a bit and jokes, “Gardening? Are you in early retirement or something?” You feel your face flush and scramble in your mind for ways to impress him, or at least make up for the fact that now he probably thinks you’re a dork. You spend the next 10 minutes almost pleading with him to understand and very seriously explaining why gardening is great, only for him to say, “I’m happy you like it, but it’s just not something I’m into.”
On the other hand, a down to earth woman won’t feel offended by his joke. She’ll laugh at it, because she recognises it’s said in good humour, and say something like, “Yeah, it’s definitely a bit nana-ish, but I love it, so that’s what counts right?” She’ll move on to the next topic naturally and he’ll feel admiration for how comfortable she is with herself.
They’re Not Dramatic
The opposite to a down to earth woman is a drama queen. When you’ve got your feet planted firmly on the ground, you don’t allow things to throw you and send you into a dramatic spin. Being calm and responsive, rather than reactive, is an intrinsic attribute of a down to earth person and one you can encourage in yourself, when you adjust your mindset.
For example, do you overreact when your guy cancels weekend plans, even though he’s got a great reason and respectfully asks you if you mind rescheduling? If so, you’re in the grip of the inner drama queen, who feels offended, rejected and not as important as she’d like to think she is.
In this circumstance, it doesn’t even occur to a down to earth woman to have an issue with it. Firstly, she’s not relying on him to make herself feel good, important or wanted. Secondly, she’s happy for him to have his own life, be spontaneous and take opportunities when they arise. Rescheduling is no drama at all and she simply looks forward to making plans with her friends for the weekend, instead.
In terms of mindset, you always have the choice to listen to the inner drama queen, or the responsive, confident you who goes with the flow of life and allows others to do the same.
They’re Low Maintenance
Finally, the number one quality of down to earth women is that they’re low maintenance. That doesn’t mean they don’t shower everyday or that they wear potato sacks out to tea. It means they don’t need constant reassurance within a relationship, in order to feel good about themselves or their man.
This is the top reason why men love down to earth women, so it really helps to understand what low maintenance means. She’s the girl who’s happily seeing her man off at the door, as he heads out on a boy’s camping weekend. She’s letting him know she’ll be at her besty’s for the night and asking him to say hi to the guys for her. She’s kissing him passionately before he goes and telling him she can’t wait to hear about it, when he gets back.
As he leaves, you can bet he’s already missing her.
She’s not tearfully asking him to call her as soon as he arrives, text her throughout the day and watch how many beers he drinks. She’s not asking him if he’ll miss her and telling him she almost can’t stand the thought of being apart. She’s not having a mini tantrum when he tells her to relax, as it’s only two nights. She’s not feeling insecure about him leaving and needing reassurance that he still wants her.
And, she’s not just ‘playing it cool’, either. The down to earth woman has her own life and feels truly happy when her man is out living his. The good news is, this is an uncomplicated, accepting way of life that anyone can choose to live.
When you accept yourself and feel comfortable in your own skin, you won’t need to write, ‘down to earth’ on your dating profile. It’ll be obvious in everything you do and you’ll soon find that the down to earth men you seek, will stand up and take notice.