How To Make Him Miss You In A Long Distance Relationship

Long distance relationships can be exciting, romantic and almost as satisfying as cosy coupledom at home. Whether you’ve met someone online or one of you has to move for work, when you’re committed, there’s no reason geographical differences need to get in the way of your passion.

First thing’s first though – there’s a big difference between a long distance relationship with a foreseeable end date to your time apart, and one that leads to inevitable disconnection. So…

You Must Have An Endpoint

Before you think about how to make him miss you while he’s away, it’s important to determine if it’s worth it to commit to a long-distance relationship, in the beginning.

Granted, that’s not something anyone likes to hear. We’d all like to think that love will find a way, regardless of the circumstances. Unfortunately, it’s often too hard to maintain a connection, without physically being in each other’s presence on a regular basis.

After a while, the benefits simply don’t outweigh the negatives. Part of the excitement of a long distance relationship, is the anticipation of seeing each other again, the steamy reunions and the fulfilment of feeling like absence really does make the heart grow fonder. While this is true, you’ll never get to actually feel it, if you never see each other.

If you can’t sort out scheduled visits, it’s better if you don’t enter a relationship and simply keep things casual, so that unrealistic expectations don’t lead to a negative experience. In the future, if you find yourselves back in the same location, you’ll have a much better chance of reuniting because you’ve left each other on positive terms.

On the other hand, if you’re ready to jump in, it’s all about delivering the ‘boyfriend benefits’ men want, despite the distance.

Use The Extra Time You Have Effectively

One of the biggest benefits of a long-distance relationship is the extra time you have to spend on yourself. You can prioritise your friends, start a new hobby and chase those dreams that don’t necessarily include him. Doing this proves to him how very worth it you are and he’ll automatically miss being part of your exciting life, on a day-to-day basis.

Remember that this doesn’t mean being unavailable, not prioritising his phone calls or deliberately ignoring him just to ‘appear’ busy or mysterious. After all, there’s no need to manipulate him into missing you, when you’re using your time effectively and proving that you are, in fact, happy in your own life.

It’s all about working on yourself and showing him that, although you’re apart, your world hasn’t come to an end. In the process of being the best ‘you’, you become more attractive in his eyes and he’ll be wondering what you’re up to, where you are and, most of all, when he can see you next.

Make Yourself Happy

It makes sense that your man is a major source of happiness in your life, which is why you’re together in the first place. But, when you’re not, you don’t get to enjoy the little things like cuddling in the morning, having breakfast together and laughing at the movies, all the time.

Even when you’re together, it’s important that each of you takes responsibility for your own happiness, rather than expect the other to make it happen. So, when you’re apart, you need to make an effort to replace this source of happiness with things that make you smile, every single day.

“It’s important that each of you takes responsibility for your own happiness, rather than expect the other to make it happen”

If you don’t, you might feel the absence of his happiness source and unfairly blame it on him. This can lead to those awkward, needy conversations which only serve to push him away, rather than make him miss you. The best thing is, while you’re deliberately doing things to ensure your own happiness, you’ll be improving yourself and your life in general, which makes you totally miss-worthy.

Be Your Own Source Of Self-Assurance

One of the most testing aspects of long distance relationships is dealing with jealousy, insecurity and the need to seek constant reassurance from your guy. Considering the only thing you really have while he’s away is phone conversations, you need to make sure you don’t waste them on trying to make him prove himself.

It is hard, at times, when you don’t know what he’s doing and you’re worried someone else might catch his eye. However, if you trust him when he’s home, you can trust him when he’s away. In fact, if you don’t, you should probably rethink your relationship anyway.

Remind yourself how lucky he is to have you and that’s all the self-assurance you need. When you feel secure in yourself, you won’t feel like you need his constant reassurance and he’ll bask in the light of your trust. Showing self-respect in this way will also remind him of the high-value woman you are, which is the woman he loves to miss.

Make Your Calls Something He Looks Forward To

Imagine if your man bitched about his day, every time you spoke. You’d soon start rolling your eyes when his name came up on the phone. While it’s fine to talk about it when you have a bad day and to expect his support if most of your calls are negative they’ll soon become a chore neither of you looks forward to.

You want his eyes to light up when you call because he can’t wait to hear your beautiful voice. When you’re making yourself happy and being the source of your own security, your conversations will be positive, exciting and a highlight of his week.

Deliver Boyfriend Benefits From Afar

There are certain cool benefits of relationships that men absolutely love and you can most certainly deliver them from afar. In fact, making the most of the limited contact you have in this way, strengthens your connection in much the same way it does when you’re together.

Support, love and companionship

When you’re together, a simple touch or tight hug is often enough to show your love and support. You need to get a little more creative while you’re apart, so you’re not missing out on the feeling of love you usually receive through physical touch. The Rhetorical Text is the perfect way to show love, as it doesn’t require a response. A simple kiss emoji or cute statement will surprise him while showing that you’re thinking of him without needing anything.

Be there for him in the same way you would in a regular relationship. When he needs you, lend a supportive ear, offer advice and help him to feel positive and uplifted. Always treat him like the friend and partner he is, as if thousands of miles weren’t separating you.

Keep the excitement flowing

When you’re using all that extra time the right way, to work on yourself and achieve your goals, the excitement will automatically keep flowing. Men love this part of relationships because they can’t wait to be involved in your wonderful world. Bring him into it by telling him about your new hobby, what you’ve been doing with your friends or how much you loved skydiving. He’s going to miss being right there with you while anticipating what you’ll have to say next time you talk.

“Tell him about your new hobby, what you’ve been doing with your friends or how much you loved skydiving.”

Show Him Loyalty And Honesty

Just like you, men love to feel safe in the knowledge that you’re not seeing anyone else. However, chances are with all the fun stuff you’re doing, other men will notice you – and there’s no reason to keep this to yourself. By all means, tell him about the guy you had to fob off last Saturday night at the bar. He’ll be reminded of how amazing you are, he’ll know you’re honest about that kind of thing and he’ll feel proud and secure that you only have eyes for him.

Give Him Sex On Tap

Obviously, no sex (if you’re exclusive), is one of the downfalls of long distance relationships. You can still give him the sexual girlfriend experience though, and one that’ll turn the heat up for the next time you see each other.

Have fun with it, get creative and you’ll both build a type of exquisite desire and anticipation for each other, that only long distance relationships can conjure. Take cheeky pics to tease him. Send sexy texts about what you want him to do to you. Tell him what you were thinking about when you were touching yourself in the shower last night. Initiate phone sex by saying how much you want to…it’s your turn to fill in the blanks.

He won’t be able to stop visualising all the sexy scenarios he’s in store for when he finally gets to have you. The added bonus? The simple feeling of missing you won’t even come close to the overwhelming desire he’ll have for you, and only you.



Meet Mark Rosenfeld

The Dating & Relationship Breakthrough Coach For Women

For the past 7 years, I’ve coached hundreds of women just like you. Whether you are working through a breakup, looking for your life partner or pursuing a better relationship with yourself — I have the tools and strategies you need to deepen your connections, increase your fulfillment and sustain meaningful relationships.

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